It's there for the seeking

   Peace is out there.  It's available.  It's a real thing. But it's not something you just fall into or are handed on a silver platter.  It takes seeking, searching out.  It's progressive, but in the seeking there is finding not only peace but the promises that come with those who seek peace- a  Future.
   We reward people for DOING something: you get paid for the hours you work, you reward your kids with a family ice cream party when they finish a school book or grade in school, you give them a treat when they finish cleaning their rooms, etc.  The reward is tied to the accomplishment - pursuing something to its end goal.  However, if you got the reward for nothing, given money regularly without working for it, it would lose its value. We don't tend to utilize well or appreciate things received lightly, easily.  We take them for granted, thereby bypassing the true blessing of that reward and squandering it.
   I think that's why we have to seek out peace and any good thing, to appreciate it and utilize it well.  If we are given something before it's time, before we've sought it out, wrestled for it, we could end up like Israel: obtaining what we want be in exchange having leanness of soul\.  It would end up taking from us much more than it gave and the very thing we wanted would destroy us because we're not ready to carry the weight and responsibility of it.
  What if King George had walked away from America, had given the land to the colonists without a fight - they had a peaceable transition of power?  Would we as a fledgling nation have been able to formulate such a solid government structure, known what we wanted and didn't want and wrestled over big ideas that changed a world if we had obtained it lightly? Would we have appreciated peace, had we not wartime first?
   Sometimes in the midst of seeking, of desperately needing it and wanting it, it's hard not to be resentful when peace or that thing we are seeking seems so intangible, so far away.  I'm reminding myself that there's a purpose in the seeking, there's a growth, a deeper level of understanding and need and will be a deeper appreciation and experience of the many facets of peace as it is revealed and walked out.  Not that life is absent of it or that there aren't great blessings of supernatural peace in difficult situations along the way, but I want to learn to walk in it 24-7, unshaken, unshakable.
  Isaac Newton new what it meant to have to fight for everything he wanted or pursued in life and wrote this hymn out of the struggle. His story Story of Isaac Watts


Beautiful rendition of song
Am I a Soldier of the Cross

1 Am I a soldier of the cross,
a foll'wer of the Lamb?
And shall I fear to own His cause
or blush to speak His Name?

2 Must I be carried to the skies
on flow'ry beds of ease,
while others fought to win the prize
and sailed through bloody seas?

3 Are there no foes for me to face?
Must I not stem the flood?
Is this vile world a friend to grace
to help me on to God?

4 Sure I must fight, if I would reign;
increase my courage, Lord;
I'll bear the toil, endure the pain,
supported by Thy Word.

5 Thy saints in all this glorious war
shall conquer, though they die;
they see the triumph from afar
by faith's discerning eye.

6 When that illustrious day shall rise,
and all Thine armies shine
in robes of vict'ry through the skies,
the glory shall be Thine.

Peace, a matter of perspective

I've been pondering over, meditating on, searching out Psalm 119: 161-168 "Princes persecute me without cause. but my heart stands in awe of Your Word. I rejoice at Your Word as one who finds great treasure.  I hate and abhor lying but I love Your law.  Seven times a day I praise You because of Your righteous judgments.   Great PEACE have those who love Your law, and nothing causes them to stumble. Lord, I hope for your salvation, and I do Your commandments. My soul keeps Your testimonies, and I love them exceedingly.  I keep Your precepts and Your testimonies, for all my ways are before You."  
   I've wrestled over what this tells me about PEACE.  His life isn't at PEACE  - as he has those in authority and those who should be supporting him, persecuting him.  This isn't a PEACE coming from restful, easy circumstances, but one banked on the nature of GOD and His Word.  All the craziness around him, the persecution takes a back seat, does not consume his focus and vision, but his heart, his eyes, his attitude are set on the UNCHANGEABLE, that which is and always will be GOOD and RIGHT.  As he sets his heart on GOD's Word, he finds hope, PEACE, sure footing and faith that with GOD, in the end, you always win. 
  Being the anniversary of my brother, Jeremiah Small, being murdered in Iraq this week, I've naturally been thinking a lot about him and his life and the events surrounding his death.  No one looking on would describe what happened as peaceful, but as far as he was concerned, he went out with peace.  He was praying, eyes closed, focus on the Faithful One, and as shots rang out, he was instantly transported into His presence.  His life was completely in GOD's hands, and in a moment, GOD took him. 
    In my day to day, I'm reminded that my PEACE isn't dependent on a well structured, restful, happy, placid environment.  Not that those things aren't very nice! But if I waited for that to walk in PEACE, I would spend most of my days in frustration.  PEACE in the day to day, in the midst of turmoil and trouble or just the busyness of young children and a busy household, must solely be dependent on my focus.  On my heart, my focus being on that which changes not based on external circumstances or feelings, but is Truth.  Praise, loving what is good, placing hope in Him, walking in obedience to the One who orders all things rightly and sees me. 
  This week my focus verse at CC in Essentials was Gen 16:13  She gave this name to the Lord who spoke to her: “You are the God who sees me,” for she said, “I have now seen the One who sees me.”  I was struck again that both seeing Him rightly and seeing that He sees us to look upon us with compassion makes all the difference in our perspective on life and our situation.  I'm reminded over an over lately that our perception of our experiences - the way we see things, and the way we feel about things can lie.  It's like a distorted reflection that can be changed by putting your finger in the water.  Our feelings can change so quickly, that to base decisions upon them can lead us to dark and dangerous places, because Satan knows how to use our feelings against us, but if we set our eyes one the One who sees and sees rightly, we will begin not only to see rightly but to feel rightly.

story behind the hymn
Fox news version of Jeremiah's story   
Song
WORLD on Jeremiah Small

Imparting peace

   Peace is a gift you can give.  It's a way of extending forgiveness and letting someone know that you hold them harmless for any offense.  David extended this kind of peace to Abigail after her husband turned away the hungry band of roaming warrior shepherds (1 Sam 25) and to Abner who was his enemy's chief commander.  Maybe this Valentines, you need to impart peace to the ones you love?  It's so easy to live all wound up, tense and judgmental - quickly coming down on negative/bad behavior, but we're often less quick to impart peace, to let someone know that no matter what has happened in the past - we hold them harmless, exonerate them from any retaliation or emotional repercussions.  Forgiveness means that as their weakness flows toward us (being injured themselves or hurt by others), our strength flows toward them (we go take up our cross of forgiveness and carry their burden of sin for them). When we respond in anger, the core of that is self-love whereas forgiveness requires self-sacrifice.  To be broken and then forgive causes our suffering to be our glory. In 2Cor. 2, Paul adjures those who have been caused grief by others to forgive and comfort the offender, reaffirm your love and not allow the person who has offended to be swallowed up in grief over their sin.  And repeatedly we are instructed to forgive in the same manner as Christ forgave us, even tying to it the forgiveness of the Father.  For, forgiveness is our glorious warfare which can open up wells of revival in the midst of our lives, family and community.  Forgiveness is a choice of will and the proofs of forgiveness are exemplified in Joseph's forgiveness of his brother, extending peace to them when they feared his retaliation.
1. Like Joseph, you tell nobody what they did to you.
2. You don't let them be nervous around you or be afraid - you love them
3. You don't WANT them to be nervous or afraid around you
4. You let them save face
5. You protect them from their secret.
   


    Maybe there's someone you need to extend forgiveness to?  Forgiveness in the same manner that we, astoundingly, have been forgiven of ALL and brought into fellowship with the GODHEAD. Let the PEACE that passes understanding guard your heart and open it up to realms of deep forgiveness.

And Can It Be?

1. And can it be that I should gain
   An int’rest in the Savior’s blood?
   Died He for me, who caused His pain—
   For me, who Him to death pursued?
   Amazing love! How can it be,
   That Thou, my God, shouldst die for me?
   • Refrain:
     Amazing love! How can it be,
     That Thou, my God, shouldst die for me?
2. ’Tis myst’ry all: th’ Immortal dies:
   Who can explore His strange design?
   In vain the firstborn seraph tries
   To sound the depths of love divine.
   ’Tis mercy all! Let earth adore,
   Let angel minds inquire no more.
3. He left His Father’s throne above—
   So free, so infinite His grace—
   Emptied Himself of all but love,
   And bled for Adam’s helpless race:
   ’Tis mercy all, immense and free,
   For, O my God, it found out me!
4. Long my imprisoned spirit lay,
   Fast bound in sin and nature’s night;
   Thine eye diffused a quick’ning ray—
   I woke, the dungeon flamed with light;
   My chains fell off, my heart was free,
   I rose, went forth, and followed Thee.
5. No condemnation now I dread;
   Jesus, and all in Him, is mine;
   Alive in Him, my living Head,
   And clothed in righteousness divine,
   Bold I approach th’ eternal throne,
   And claim the crown, through Christ my own.
6. Story behind the hymn
7. Song
8. 

He will hold me fast

  Walking in peace, it takes courage. Repeatedly in Scripture,  different ones are given the injunction: "Do not be afraid, be strong and of good courage." There are many, every day stories of courage to stand up against great opposition, stand for conviction like Kim Davis, who wouldn't back down and sign the homosexual marriage certificate and subsequently spent 6 days behind bars.  But what I find to be my greatest struggle is not the courage to stand publicly on Biblical issues or points of conviction, but the courage to stand daily, quietly, firmly against my flesh and feelings.  In the midst of a culture that is all about following your heart and your ever-changeable feelings, I find my biggest battle ground, my greatest need for courage. The courage not to stand for my own needs, desires or feelings but to lay them down to stand on God's truth, His joy, His sacrifice, His love.  God grant me the courage to stand and fight the good fight of faith in my own heart and soul, the courage to respond in grace and gentleness when faced with disrespect, disregard, disinterest or distaste.  The courage to love when it hurts and press through the pain to keep on loving.  The courage to be vulnerable to know and be known, be let down and get back up.  The courage to look with tenderness and kindness rather than shoot angry darts and hurtful glances.  The courage to reveal the kingdom when life looks like the enemy's winning and hope is dying.  The courage to get back up and have grace for myself when I've failed again, when my list is too long and my energy too short, when brokenness rather than joy seems to be my song.    
   "Be strong and of good courage, do not fear or be afraid, for the Lord your God, He is the One who goes with you (into those deep, dark places of your soul, the broken, rebellious places), He will not leave you or forsake you." Deut. 31:6   Because He has promised not to leave me alone - not in my homeschooling/child training, not in my marriage or mounting to-do list, not in my job or relationships, I can walk in freedom from fears and anxiety, receive all he gives with peace, trust and gentleness.  Many are the fears that would threaten to rise up and swallow me whole, deviate my focus, increase my anxiety which leads to all manner of frustrations and anger.  We have fear of failure: in jobs, in child raising/training/educating, in duties as a spouse, in interpersonal relationships, in coping/emotional health, the list goes on and on.  But His Word COMMANDS me not to fear, be anxious for NOTHING, TRUST in His help and leading.  His word PROMISES that those who LOOK to Him are radiant with joy and no shadow darkens their face because He is the HELPER of all those who call on Him.  So I can LOOK, I  can CALL, I can CHOOSE to walk in FAITH.  
  I need the courage to let my thoughts/plans be established, established with peace and trust.  Trust that when my best laid plans and schedule all go awry, His ways are higher and better and peaceable, if I will allow it. Courage not to wallow in self-pity or let my joy be dependent on how I'm treated, on my accomplishments or lack their of, or on my children and their attitudes, responses or accomplishments.  Courage to remember that not only am I in training, but so are my children, my husband...Courage to set my eyes on Him and my heart toward relationship, not just getting things done, and so walk after Him and let Him take care of the details, resting in what He gives.  Holding fast to Him in faith. 

“When I fear my faith will fail
Christ will hold me fast
When the tempter would prevail
He will hold me fast
I could never keep my hold
Through life’s fearful path
For my love is often cold
He must hold me fast

Chorus:
He will hold me fast
He will hold me fast
For my Savior loves me so
He will hold me fast

Those He saves are His delight
Christ will hold me fast
Precious in His holy sight
He will hold me fast
He’ll not let my soul be lost
His promises shall last
Bought by Him at such a cost
He will hold me fast

CHORUS

For my life He bled and died
Christ will hold me fast
Justice has been satisfied
He will hold me fast
Raised with Him to endless life
He will hold me fast
Till our faith is turned to sight
When he comes at last

CHORUS”
Song

Fear and Peace

Hiding away, secretly harvesting the crops, Gideon trembled when Someone spoke to him, saying, “The Lord is with you, mighty warrior.”  (Speaking those things that are not as though they are. - He does that a lot over us, you know.  Calling out of us what we didn't know He had placed there.) Gideon questioned, "If the Lord is with us, then why are we oppressed, why do we have to be in hiding, secretly bringing in our crops before the Midianites get to them so we don't starve?  The Lord has abandoned us - we know He can do great things, because He's done it before, but my eyes have seen none of that." (my paraphrase)  Then, Gideon gets his commission as the Lord tells him to go in the strength he has and defeat Midian.  Fitly, Gideon replies: "My father's house is the weakest in our tribe and I'm the least in my family...essentially, "What strength??? I don't have any strength to boast.  Didn't you see me hiding and trembling?"  At this honest, humble response, the Lord replies, "Yes, then I will be with you and go before you.  I will defeat Midian before you."  At this promise, Gideon prepared and offered a sacrifice, and it was consumed before him, and the Visitor evaporated into the flames and smoke and disappeared.  It wasn't until then that Gideon realized, Who had been speaking to him and he feared for his life, having spoken face to face with the Angel of the Lord.  Yet, the Angel of the Lord reassured him with the much reiterated statement throughout Scripture when one encounters the Lord or his messengers, “Peace! Do not be afraid. You are not going to die.”  In response to this, Gideon built an altar and called it The Lord is Peace. And from there he saw miracles as God delivered the hoards of Midian into the hands of a motley crew of merely 300 armed with torches, pitchers, trumpets and swords.   
     John tells us there is no fear in LOVE but that Love is also PEACE and certainly fear and peace are antithesis of one another.  In fact, I think fear of anything except the Fear of the Lord leads to unrest, turmoil.  Gideon learned that there is One worth trembling before, in awe and acknowledgement of His great majesty, OTHERNESS and power, but He does not want us to fear.  And when we come to the place when nothing else holds any fear for us, and the will of God no matter how impossible or daunting becomes PEACE, we have come to a place of Faith, to an understanding of Who He is. There is a Peace that comes from knowing that He is with us, He is for us, He is our deliverer, provider.  With God as our ally, what have we to fear? 
   I tend to fear my own failure, the list of things I haven't gotten to or can't get to today, the lack of time or time that slips away too fast, the struggle between what I desire to do, the parent and wife I desire to be, and the reality of what is...and I tremble at that.  God is calling us not to be afraid of these things.  Not to tremble before lesser things (maybe it's all about trembling before Him or before lesser things?) but to see Him, high, lifted up, all capable, all knowing, full of compassion, Sovereign over all things and let His Lordship be PEACE. 

Because the Fear of the Lord is PEACE.

   Praise the One who made all things well and can certainly order our days, order our lives, even order our time and decisions and relationships well.  Trust that He can and will, then yield to His Peace.























All Creatures of our God and King by St Francis of Assisi
All creatures of our God and King,
Lift up your voice and with us sing,
Alleluia! Alleluia!
Thou burning sun with golden beam,
Thou silver moon with softer gleam!

Refrain:
O praise Him! O praise Him!
Alleluia! Alleluia! Alleluia!
Thou rushing wind that art so strong,
Ye clouds that sail in heav’n along,
O praise Him! Alleluia!

Thou rising moon, in praise rejoice,
Ye lights of evening, find a voice!
Thou flowing water, pure and clear,
Make music for thy Lord to hear,
O praise Him! Alleluia!

Thou fire so masterful and bright,
That givest man both warmth and light.
And all ye men of tender heart,
Forgiving others, take your part,
O praise Him! Alleluia!

Ye who long pain and sorrow bear,
Praise God and on Him cast your care!
Let all things their Creator bless,
And worship Him in humbleness,
O praise Him! Alleluia!

Praise, praise the Father, praise the Son,
And praise the Spirit, Three in One!
Song
Story behind the hymn

A lesson in peace

     It had been a restless night's sleep.  I made myself get up and start spending some quiet time with the Lord and at 6:45 our exchange student came and got me.  Telling me she had been up all night with a stomach ache, she asked me for some medicine for her stomach.  I grabbed her some medicine from my small at-home pharmacy and returned to my Bible and prayer.  Not 10 minutes later, I heard her vomiting violently in the bathroom.  I went to see if I could help her in any way and noticed the vomit - all over the toilet, floor and splattered up against the walls and floor of the shower - she hadn't quite made it in time.  As I surveyed the mess, knowing that my day was already off to a late start, all I really wanted was to finish my "time with the Lord" before getting dressed, fixing breakfast and starting my day.  However, I sent her to her room and let her know I would clean up the mess.

     As I began cleaning up, the Lord began to speak to me in ways that He may not have been able to when I was so busy with my quiet time - spending time talking to Him.  He showed me how easy it is to compartmentalize our day and our understanding of life in Him.  It's easy to think of Bible time as my "time in the presence of the Lord," and then we get up and move on from that presence to the rest of the day.  The Lord gently reminded me that cleaning up vomit while communing with Him, doing it as a service to Him was just as much or even more valuable to Him than all the quiet time I could give.  The whole point of Christianity is the Christ has come to reveal Himself in and with and through us at every moment of our day, not just relegate time in His Presence to special segments of our day/week.  Then, as we begin to really grab hold of and assimilate this truth, all of life becomes about living in His presence and letting Him dictate our time.  Cleaning up vomit wasn't on the top of my list, but it was His gift to me that day, the way He wanted me to spend my time in that moment.  So much of my peace disturbance revolves around time.  If my day is a rush and I experience one delay after another, kids aren't concentrating in school and it takes twice as long as it should or more, others place demands on my time, my Spirit/soul get so stirred up and anxious.  His challenge to me is this: Will I really trust Him with all my time and see ALL that I do as it truly is - time in his presence - and walk in joyful peace as I serve Him in all the little and big tasks He sends, along with the curve balls that knock my day completely off the course I had intended for it.
 
     God made a covenant of peace with Phineas when his zeal for the things of GOD, caused him to act according to God's justice, as he saw all of life as an act of worship to GOD.  We have also been given a covenant of peace with God through the cross and can walk in that as we make all of life and act of sacrifice and worship. Num.25:12
Alas! and Did My Savior Bleed

1
Alas, and did my Savior bleed?
  And did my Sovereign die?
Would He devote that sacred head
  For such a worm as I?
  At the cross, at the cross where
  I first saw the light,
And the burden of my heart rolled away,
It was there by faith I received my sight,
  And now I am happy all the day!
2
Was it for sins that I had done
  He groaned upon the tree?
Amazing pity! grace unknown!
  And love beyond degree!
3
Well might the sun in darkness hide,
  And shut His glories in,
When Christ, the mighty Maker, died
  For man, His creature’s sin.
4
Thus might I hide my blushing face
  While His dear cross appears.
Dissolve my heart in thankfulness,
  And melt mine eyes to tears.
5
But drops of grief can ne’er repay
  The debt of love I owe;
Here, Lord, I give myself away,
  ’Tis all that I can do.

Beautiful rendition, alternative tune
Story behind the hymn

   Peace: 1 freedom from disturbance; quiet; tranquility 2.freedom from or the cessation of war or violence 3. serenity, calm, composure, contentment, equanimity. 

    There's a serenity, a tranquility and soul quietness that comes not just from calm or peaceful surroundings free from adversity but from Whom you are with.  Knowing that... someone has your back, that nothing can move or shake you apart from admittance by an infinitely good Father who can cause five to chase 100 and 100 to put 10,000 to flight... imbues one with unshakable security - unshakable as long as one REMEMBERS this truth.  
   In reading on peace this week, I came across this passage - a promise of peace in the land as a gift for those who walk in obedience, accompanied by a greater GIFT of Himself and the promise that He Himself would abide, would dwell with and be the I AM, the All Sufficient in the midst of a people.  I feel like if I but saw the reality of His power or even just the angels tasked to guard me, or my children, nothing could shake me or make me afraid ever again.  Yet, seeing is not believing, for Israel saw many things and many times failed to believe.  But believing is having full CONFIDENCE in the unalterable TRUTH of what He says and knowing HE IS whom He says HE IS.  
  I want to be like Moses who told GOD he wouldn't move on until He knew God would continue to go with them and before them...or even more like Joshua who wouldn't leave the tent of meeting outside the camp because he wanted to just be where He was.  No wonder he was chosen as the next leader of God's people.  He had seen it all, errors in the people, errors in leadership and had come to know that there was nothing life had to offer better than being in God's presence.  When others fail us, when earthly joys are hard to come by, when change is hard and staying in the same spot is harder, when we can't see our way or temptations seem irresistible, His abiding presence makes all the difference in the world and is Constancy, JOY, Clarity, Righteousness and Grace unending. 
   If His abiding presence isn't the essence of peace, I don't know what is...So, my pursuit of peace leads me also to pursue His abiding presence, to be rooted and grounded in Him and to live in His presence and in the confidence that He is Who He says He is and He is for me!

Leviticus 26:3 “‘If you follow my decrees and are careful to obey my commands, 4 I will send you rain in its season, and the ground will yield its crops and the trees their fruit. 5 Your threshing will continue until grape harvest and the grape harvest will continue until planting, and you will eat all the food you want and live in safety in your land.

6 “‘I will grant peace in the land, and you will lie down and no one will make you afraid. I will remove wild beasts from the land, and the sword will not pass through your country. 7 You will pursue your enemies, and they will fall by the sword before you. 8 Five of you will chase a hundred, and a hundred of you will chase ten thousand, and your enemies will fall by the sword before you.

9 “‘I will look on you with favor and make you fruitful and increase your numbers, and I will keep my covenant with you. 10 You will still be eating last year’s harvest when you will have to move it out to make room for the new. 11 I will put my dwelling place[a] among you, and I will not abhor you. 12 I will walk among you and be your God, and you will be my people. 13 I am the Lord your God, who brought you out of Egypt so that you would no longer be slaves to the Egyptians; I broke the bars of your yoke and enabled you to walk with heads held high.

1. Abide with me; fast falls the eventide;
   The darkness deepens; Lord, with me abide;
   When other helpers fail and comforts flee,
   Help of the helpless, oh, abide with me.
2. Swift to its close ebbs out life’s little day;
   Earth’s joys grow dim, its glories pass away;
   Change and decay in all around I see—
   O Thou who changest not, abide with me.
3. I need Thy presence every passing hour;
   What but Thy grace can foil the tempter’s pow’r?
   Who, like Thyself, my guide and stay can be?
   Through cloud and sunshine, Lord, abide with me.
4. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3PrwSTyPJtw
5. I fear no foe, with Thee at hand to bless;
   Ills have no weight, and tears no bitterness;
   Where is death’s sting? Where, grave, thy victory?
   I triumph still, if Thou abide with me.
6. Hold Thou Thy cross before my closing eyes;
   Shine through the gloom and point me to the skies;
   Heav’n’s morning breaks, and earth’s vain shadows flee;
   In life, in death, O Lord, abide with me.

Abide With Me
Story behind the hymn