Opening a Door

 

You've heard it said: "When God closes one door, he opens another one (or a window)." 

A door gives a sense of mystery, of the unknown, of opportunity, of stepping into something new and sometimes that holds some fear.  What will be on the other side? Hope? Excitement? Sunshine? or rain? Disaster? The Valley of the Shadow?  Take a deep breath, exhale slowly and open the door.

There's so much literature that talks about doors.  This one reminds me of The Secret Garden, a hidden door with lock and key, a garden dead and waiting for cultivation, love and new life, a place of rebirth, renewal, intrigue that also once held great sorrow.

  My son and I just finished reading the classic The Door in the Wall.  I get choked up at the end when the boy, having overcome much hardship and adversity, demonstrates extreme courage and gets honored for it and all his fears of failure, not being good enough because he's crippled, not being accepted as a worthy son get overwhelmingly met with such love, grace, appreciation and acknowledgement, that he begins seeing himself not as "that crippled boy who will never amount to much" but as someone who has a gift to contribute to the world and many talents.  And the faithful monk who has cared for him and taught him the importance of recognizing that there is always the door in the wall.  How many times do we just see the wall looming large and formidable, insurmountable in the face of our incapability, weakness or sense of unworthiness and then live there rather than finding our door in the wall, our opportunity to break through the barriers and walls around us and enter into a whole new dimension, a new understanding, a new path.  Robin had many doors in the walls of his loss and crippling disease - learning to read and write opened doors, learning to whittle, play instruments, walk with crutches, swim and gain upper body strength, shoot a bow and arrow, and learning to seek God and go to him all day, every day, in the coming and going - taking time to adore, pray and encounter God.  Each of these were doors that opened whole new worlds, possibilities and opportunities, pulling him out of being a victim of circumstance, learning to use or overcome his weaknesses as strengths: "when I am weak, then I am strong..." "That is why, for Christ's sake, I delight in weaknesses, in insults, in hardships and persecutions, in difficulties.  For when I am weak, then I am strong."  2 Cor. 12:10  

Without opportunities, difficulties, challenges and weaknesses, we might never discover or even think to look for that door in the wall.  When we encounter complacency, we trap ourselves within 4 walls of stagnancy, and when we go victim, the walls start closing in, our self-pity locking us in fear of what is, the unknown and the future, which keeps us from seeing the door in the wall.  And perhaps the very thing we fear, the pain that lead to the fear, the hardship breaking us, is God's invitation to walk through a door into something new.  He is so much about growing us and building our character deep and wide and loves us so much that He may gift us with a pain unbearable, a major health issue, a financial struggle or loss, a broken friendship, a weight that seems too heavy to carry, so that we might not be encumbered any longer by the limitations that once held us, that we might learn to be fear-overcomers, good stewards of our lives and finances, prayer warriors who don't give up, great men/women of faith who believe in a God capable of the impossible and willing to step into the impossible with Him.  

What if...we could see the waiting, the struggle and trial, the pain, the setbacks as opportunities, as hard but good gifts from a loving God who knows us better then we know ourselves and knows how to produce good in us, shift us, grow us in depth of character so we can bear the weight of the calling on our lives.

What if...He could give us beauty for ashes and the oil of joy for mourning - turning our mourning into dancing and causing ALL THINGS to work together for good.

What if...we really could be anxious for nothing, thankful for all things and devoted to prayer because of RADICAL TRUST that He will always have a door in the wall for us to walk thru.

History Repeats Itself

 I love that history not only repeats itself, teaches us and tells a story we can identify with, it also reveals a truth allegorically about our walk with God.  Israel, especially and her history, is a prophetic history that keeps unfolding the plan of God for the journey of the heart.

I think of Israel's journey to Egypt.  They went in a time of need, and it was a place of provision for them, and they stayed in that place of provision, but it was far from the place of promise that God had given them.  Then, the place of provision became their place of bondage.  That which began good enslaved them because good things make bad gods.  Good things can keep us or sidetrack us from holding fast to the promise of God and then we live in a land - a facade of the promise that begins to enslave us.  And sometimes we can even come to love our bondage or cling to what's familiar even when it's crushing us. Then, God in His mercy reminds us that he has a promise for us, a place of authority, ownership and freedom. 

Sometimes, even then, even when longing for freedom and desiring deliverance from bondage, we resist the process of being set free because sometimes in the midst of that, things become harder, darker, more painful and bondage is released in the breaking and breaking free of our attachments to good things that have become bad gods.  God separates us from the things, the comfort and familiarity that we have come to trust in, put faith in.  God has to remind us that He has better things for us and when we give him our yes- to get called back to freedom, the enemy will rise up and resist our exodus into freedom, and it may get scary and messy, but He has made a way - through blood and sacrifice and passing through the waters so that we can set our feet on new ground in freedom, letting our old desires, bondage and enemy be drowned in the waters that allow us to rise up into newness of life, fixing our eyes on the promise and walking out and imperfect journey into freedom. 

I love baptisms and the beautiful picture of dying to what was, letting it wash away, burying sin and self-absorption and all other lesser things and being raised to newness of life.  It's like a seal on the decision: I have decided to follow Jesus.  I have decided to walk out of Egypt and into the Promise Land, to follow Him out of bondage and into freedom, come what may.  Freedom is worth living for, fighting for and walking out.

HOPE

 There's hope for me yet, I'm sure, though consistency hasn't been my strong suit, I keep trying and one day, perhaps that will be a word that defines an aspect of who I am.  My hope is to post a weekly blog this year looking back at lessons God has taught me and pressing into the depths of what He's teaching me now. I invite you to come along for the ride - it might be rocky, some uneven ground, but I hear the Spirit calling me deeper, into a place of quietness, intimacy, a conversation with the TRIUNE GOD! 

 And so, I come.  Will you come with me? To gaze upon Him, get caught up and captivated in His presence, wrecked by His love.  This morning during worship at church, the beauty, glory and worth of Jesus caused me to weep in wonder, awe, love and humility.  I, so small and insignificant, have captured the heart of the Almighty - because He made me to captivate Him, commune with Him, live in and bask under the radiant beauty and merciful goodness of His love and nature in the midst of a life often fraught with uncertainty, pain, brokenness, confusion and fear - there He meets me and calls me higher. 

Do you have a routine? A quiet place and time to get away with God, to hear His voice and pour out your heart before Him?  If not, I'd recommend that as a starting point.  For me, it has to be early morning to happen at all.  I have to be intentional.  Grab a journal and write down your experience with God, your troubles and what God says to you.  My journals, since I was young, have been a series of letters to God sprinkled in with words He's said to me.  I've come to spend time each time I journal now, asking Him what He has to say and writing down His response.  Try it.  He might surprise you!

I don't know what it looks like for you - all of these look good to me! But the key is that He wants You and really KNOWING HIM and BEING KNOWN requires time and intention.  

One of my favorite authors of all time is Jeanne (Madame) Guyon.  She found an intimacy in relationship with God in prayer and through suffering that I find inspiring.  I was recently given another book recently: The Devil In the Castle that talks of faith (somewhat like Pilgrims Progress) as a progressive journey in which we can stay in the courtyard of faith, distracted by devil, things of this world or even ourselves and kept from entering the depths or we can progress steadily in our journey toward the ONE in the center of the castle who beckons us. "All Christians... have a special obligation to pursue intimacy with Christ through making personal prayer a part of daily life.  Personal or mental prayer is more than the mindless repetition of vocal prayers...Personal prayer is, above all, the welcoming of the Word of the Father into our hearts and allowing Him to dwell in us in the fullness of His sovereign dignity. This receptivity to ultimate meaning takes attentiveness, time, and silence.  The WORD MADE FLESH will act in our imagination, memory, intellect and affectivity in accord with the freedom that we grant Him, in accord with our obedience to His will.  Because His salvific power always heals and intensifies our humanity, even vocal prayer, to be a Christian, must be an exercise of an intelligence of heart bowed in obedient adoration."  "For every Christian, prayer is meant to be a journey into intimacy with the Lord, a drawing closer to His healing radiance...The same face-to-face awaiting us in glory is ours in the shadow of faith when we dare to draw close to the Lord, who has made Himself so close to us." And finally, "The demons know that, because of Baptism, the soul has a special pass to the TREASURE in the very heart of the castle, which is GOD HIMSELF." More on that later... Let's run after this TREASURE,  this PEARL OF GREAT PRICE.

Blessings upon you as you dive in and discover Him there - He's in the waiting. Let me know what you think, what you find.